I love it when I find good new wallpapers for my computer.

It’s a lot like getting awesome new clothes, but without the cost.

The final stretch.

Busy busy busy. I’ve got Computer Science work due next Monday; one assignment and two Microsoft Office exercises, one on Excel and one on Powerpoint. English project on top of that, groups of five people pick a movie and reenact certain scenes, must total fifteen minutes. And then there’s the Islamic Studies presentation. Oh, and a Genetics presentation in two weeks. Lab tests for Computer Science, Genetics and Chemistry, all next week. And speaking of Chemistry, another quiz is due soon.

By the time everything is out of the way, finals will be too close. Those start in early July. Trying to get straight A’s and bump my CGPA up to 3.8, which is what MSU wants from people that want to go to Czech. There’s some talk that the bar will be lowered to 3.75, which still wouldn’t help very much. That’s about enough room for one A- and one B+. Or 3 A-minuses. To be safe I’m aiming for the straight A’s.

Not going to be easy, though. I’m already behind in studies, and it’ll be hard to catch up what with all the work I mentioned up there. And the results for mid-sem aren’t even out yet. Hardly comforting, considering they make up 30% of the grades. Who knows, right? Maybe I bombed mid-sem, and don’t even stand a chance of getting A’s for some subjects at this point.

I’m off, work to do.

‘Not my problem’.

Awesome breakfast this morning! Met up with Sean, Vivian and Kar Yann at Centrepoint’s McD. Really missed everyone, it felt like I hadn’t seen a Chinese face in fifty years.

And last week too, took Aida to the new Subway in TTDI and then Tutti Frutti, a great ice cream shop. Blew a lot of money on that one but it was still worth it.

I think even if my parents didn’t insist I come home every weekend, I still would anyway. Miss my friends too much.

—

I’d like to make a small point tonight – about human selfishness.

To start, the thing about accidents and disasters that you read in the news is, usually, it’s pretty hard to connect with. They’re reported as impartially as possible, focused on the stringing together of facts. Unless you were actually there when a tragedy struck, the full impact of phrases like ‘forty dead’ or ‘hundreds dead’, doesn’t really hit you. There’s even a quote that goes, ‘The death of one person is a tragedy, the death of hundreds is a statistic’.

Reporters do this because, well, it’s their job. They have to write their pieces in such a way that the information gets through and not their emotions. That way, the story is widely accepted. It can spread itself through a large audience without the writers worrying about offending someone, which for them is the important part.  It’s tacitly understood that the bit about the emotions is for the reader to handle. But it’s hard to do that, isn’t it? Not when you don’t have much of a stake in what you’re reading, can’t really put yourselves in the shoes of someone who was really there.

Maybe you’ve read the story I’m about to relate. It’s not about the Gaza flotilla (everyone I know is rightfully mad/upset about that one) but a smaller item, reported in the Star as ‘Student dies as kiosk workers refuse to help’ . The article tells you what happened, but like I said, impartially.

What most people didn’t read was Teo Chai Yong’s firsthand account of the incident, which is right here :

FUCK BHP!!!!! FUCK BHP!!! why? let me tell you!!

this morning approx 3.20am, at Cheras Tmn Pertama roundabout,

saw a freak accident, involving a Vios, Myvi and a Lorry.

im one the first badge who arrive, mean it just happen maybe seconds ago.

Vios believe to be turtle and badly damaged. When im passing by the vios, rear passenger started to pull out the front driver and front passenger.

then when i pass the Myvi, the car was totally sardine. Heard one girl was yelling cos piined inside. I stop my car then run towards the myvi to offer a hand while calling 999 emergency line to request for ambulance and bomba.

then saw fire spark at the engine bay of myvi. while still on the phone with emergency line to provide more details, i run back to my car and drive to BHP station which is just less than 500m away from the scene.

then i request for the fire extingusher from the attendant which is kept inside. There was 4 extingusher on the ground. But the attendant refuse to pass to me.

the BHP attendant claimed dat the door cant be open.

then i shout at him, i need it! i want it! someone is pinned inside the car and its started to burn!

then the BHP attendant keep repeating he kenot borrow and open the door.

then i was like WTF! if ur kiosk is burning can u come out? then he replied yes.

then he still say he kenot open the door. Then he say his boss wont allowed to borrow. WTF!!!

then i started to amuk kicking the kiosk and punching the glass of the kiosk.

i even throw my IC to him say that if im dun return u report police.

i saw i borrow.. if i use it i will pay for it. then he keep on just smile at me.

then he ask another partner to come out. Then i start shouting and yelling at them with bad words saying dat if the girl dies you two are the murderer.

then the 2nd BHP attendant shout back at me.

i demand for their names, i told them i would complain bout them,

then the 2nd attendant copy down my number plate and said that all my acts been recorded on CCTV and he gonna report to police tumoro. I challenged him.

then i drove off back to the scene.. the car was totally burning and the poor girl was burn alive inside.

then i spoke to the Bomba and PDRM how many casualties was inside. they told me one girl.

Then i spoke to PDRM about the incident happen in BHP.. then the policemen also scold with anger WTF with them.. if i could get the fire extingushier.. the girl might be saved.

then the Policemen ask me to go police station to report a cover about the BHP, and he assured me that the stupid BHP wont get to report on me.

Personally i would like to ask, how much does 4 fire extingusher cost? isit more expensive than a life?

would like to ask the BHP petrol station’s boss! u cant afford to lose 4 fire extingusher then u better closed down your station!!!! Fuck you boss!!!!

and this is to BHP MALAYSIA!! seens your procedure to keep all safety gadget inside the kiosk… if anything happen during refueling… is your attendant gonna open the door to help? seens he claimed that the door cant be open after hours??

FUCK YOU BHP!!! FUCK YOU!!!

i personally from now on will boycott BHP… i dont know how about you all!!!

gonna give BHP HQ a call tumoro… see what the fuck will they say about this kind of safety measurement they have!!!!!

for the two BHP attendant!!! you are the murderers!!!!!

If your heart didn’t utterly break for the poor girl burned alive in her car, there might be something wrong with you. I know mine did. Amazing what a difference a firsthand account can make.

Back at MPH I had a manager exactly like those attendants, just described. It felt like all he ever cared about was how much money the store was making – never about the customers, never about the workers. Never smiled at us, appreciated us, or respected us. He’d act like his store was some sacred place that he only barely allowed us to set foot in, and which with just our presence, we were in constant danger of befouling.

So I don’t know what it is that makes people act that way, to be so self-absorbed to the extent that someone burning alive in their car is ‘not my problem’.

Being selfish doesn’t help anyone, not even the person being selfish. Think about the girl.

And she was nineteen, too. My age.